Where Was the "Glory"? A song he had once loved brought deep conviction to this young teenager’s heart. By Andrew Blackburn

Anticipating "Glory"

Church was a big part of my life from my earliest memories. At an early age, I learned the Bible stories and about Jesus, and when I was seven years old, I asked Jesus into my heart. I especially loved singing, “Glory, Glory, Glory, Somebody Touched Me,” a song where you stand up when the day of the week you were saved is mentioned. I always enjoyed standing because I was very happy to be a Christian.

However, by the time I entered junior high, I had slipped away from the Lord. I wasn’t faithful to read my Bible and pray daily. When I did, it was out of habit rather than from a desire to grow as a Christian. I never actually planned to turn away from God, but I began to place other things first in my life, and they took a toll.  God was faithful to me, and I received several warnings and opportunities to straighten things out, but unfortunately I chose to turn away from Him. I decided not to dwell on my spiritual condition, but to live my own way. I still wanted to go to Heaven, of course, but I just tried to be a good kid and not think about anything else.

Dreading "Glory"

The first time that God’s conviction really hit me hard was in one of the last Children’s Church services I was able to attend—I was thirteen, and nearing the age limit for participating. The music director announced we would sing “Glory, Glory, Glory, Somebody Touched Me” and I was terror-stricken! I knew that I could not stand up to indicate I was saved. Yet if I didn’t, I was sure everyone would notice. My mind raced as I tried to find a way of escape. I couldn’t find one, so I simply stood up.

I knew immediately that it was wrong. I also knew that I needed to get back on track with God quickly. But the devil had me where he wanted me then, and he put a fear in my heart. I became afraid of what my friends, my family, and people at church would think if it was found out that I had backslidden. Before long, I found myself making excuses for the sins I started to commit, trying to bridge the gap between me and God all by myself. I wanted to be saved, but my heart wasn’t really willing to repent.

This disastrous cycle went on for nearly three years. I had countless opportunities to get saved again, but I blew every one. Even when revival was springing up around me, I refused to yield. Though I still put on an act on the outside, I was deteriorating inside. “Glory, Glory, Glory,” once one of my favorite songs, had become my most dreaded.

However, it became more and more difficult for me to escape God’s conviction. I was miserable, but my heart was so twisted the wrong way that I was running from the One who could save me.

Admitting my lack of "Glory"

Then youth camp 2002 came. Youth camp had always been my favorite week of the year, but that year I dreaded going. The conviction that I had been bottling up inside had become uncontainable. People around me had started to notice changes in my attitude and demeanor. Though I had tried hard to stay in charge of my life, I was completely trapped and controlled by sin. There was nothing I could do to hide it anymore.

The first three days of youth camp were awful. I nearly broke down in every chapel service. God was calling after my heart, yet I was bound by my fear of what people might think. At the same time, I struggled with the fear that I might never surrender my heart to God.

Wednesday evening, I left yet another prayer service that was going on in the chapel. As I was headed toward my cabin, one of my friends joined me. I could hardly look up, God’s conviction had me so low.  Suddenly, I realized that I was tired of playing games. I turned and told my friend that I had something to tell him. I still remember the devil screaming in my ear at that moment, telling me not to do it. He said that my friend would hate me, and that I was going to wish I’d kept my mouth shut. But I didn’t care. I couldn’t possibly sleep another night without admitting my sins to somebody! And I thank the Lord to this day that He gave me courage that night.

I looked my friend in the face, and blurted out that I wasn’t saved. I looked away, not wanting to see the shock and disappointment on his face. But all he did was put an arm around my shoulder and offer words of encouragement—not disappointment or anger. He said he would pray for me to get saved that night, and then tomorrow, and however long it took for me to get saved. 

Searching for "Glory"

As I went to my bunk in the cabin, I finally understood how dumb it was to listen to the devil’s suggestions. He was a liar! I needed to turn from all that.  I finally decided that I was going to get saved and not worry about the aftereffects. It hit me that getting saved would redeem me, not condemn me.

I prayed a lot that night in my cabin, but I didn’t receive salvation. That scared me. God had called after my heart many times and I knew He wasn’t obligated to do so again, but I prayed for Him to call me once more. I knew I couldn’t get saved without being led to repentance by His Spirit.

The next day during morning chapel service, I felt desperate. I impatiently sat through the service, longing to get to the altar. There was a wonderful sermon on salvation, and by the end of it, I could not take time to go to the altar. I got on my knees beside my chair. My counselor, who was sitting near me, noticed my urgency. I told him I needed to be saved, and He began to pray with me. My friend pulled up a chair behind me, and was praying for me too. And there in that small chapel, God spoke to me again. He told me to truly choose, right then, to live for Him, or to go my own way. With all my heart, I told God I was sorry for all I had done and that I would do whatever He asked of me.

"Glory" once again!

God met me there! The burden lifted and I felt a joy and a happiness that I can’t describe. All my fears were gone, along with the sin and shame that had accompanied it. The first thing that I did was tell those who were kneeling beside me. Then I ran out of that chapel and started telling everyone I met that God had saved me! Everyone was so happy for me.

God put a hunger in my heart to keep going forward. The very next day He showed me that I was going to need my sanctification. Keeping to my earlier commitment to follow His commandments, I prayed through and received it that night. What a turnaround it was for me! Not long after that, God put it in my heart to persist in seeking what He had for me. After several months of seeking and consecrating my life to Him, I received the baptism of the Holy Spirit.

 God has been amazingly good to me. Serving Him is the only way to go, and my only regret is not accepting salvation sooner than I did. I can’t wait to dwell with Him in Heaven someday!

Andrew Blackburn is a member of the Apostolic Faith Church in Portland, Oregon. He works part-time at the headquarters office while attending college.